Her Books

Zelda Halopile’s books are a mix of off the wall, surreal humor, darkness, horror, occult, parody, and absurdness.  The books that she writes are certainly not for children or those that take this world that we live in seriously.  Nothing is safe from her written attacks –  religion, sex, celebrities, trends, and current affairs.

Zelda is going to write five very different books, each one unlocking more and more information about Zelda, who she is, where she is from, whilst making readers laugh, become rage-filled, confused, frightened, aroused and perhaps also beginning to question their own sanity and perceptions of reality, existence, time and taste buds.

Book 1 – Zelda’s Absurd Agonies
Do you have a mythical creature living in your head?  Does it look like you are off to prison because you cleared your bowels in your neighbor’s garden?  Is your child a vampire?  Do you want to be a dog? Are you unable to stop sweating to the point that you will evaporate?  If you have ever asked yourself any of these questions, then my book is for you.  Click here to find out a whole lot more about this book

Or go to http://absurdagonies.wordpress.com/

#BeAbsurd

It does more than mere invisible induction!Book 2 – Can Tea Really Make Really Make You Invisible? CTRMYI?
Zelda has discovered that tea is  behind the creation of God and Jesus, and  was also the main factor in the destruction of the dinosaurs, Hitler’s evil, JK Rowling’s success, Michael Jackson in general, Dracula, and Stephen Hawkin – as well as a whole host of other amazing events to have unfolded in human history. Learn, through over 300 pages of surreal celebrity tales, the dark secrets of tea. And learn more about the origins of Zelda Halopile. Filled to the brim with swearing, violence, line-crossing stories, the occult, time travel, Gods, monsters and legends   Click here to find out a whole lot more about this book

Or go to http://canteareallymakeyouinvisible.wordpress.com/

 #TEaVIL

Fog-picsayBook 3 – Zelda’s Encyclopedia Absurdica - Bloody Monsters, Freakin’ Aliens, Stinkin’ Ghosts, God Damn UFOs, queer Conspiracies and the rest

Zelda’s Encylopedia Absurdica – Bloody Monsters,freakin‘ Aliens, stinkin‘ ghosts, God damn UFO’s, queer conspiracies and the rest  is an upcoming book from Zelda Halopile. It will be a  book about Conspiracies, Ghost, Cryptids, UFOs and the Paranormal.

Find out more about this book here

https://encyclopediaabsurdica.wordpress.com/

 

OTHER BOOKS BY ZELDA

The Absurd Curiosities experiment

Z.A.C.A. -Cover borderAbsurd Curiosities
 is an experiment by Zelda Halopile and her artist imp, familiar, Tumulu.  The idea was to write two books at exactly the same time, featuring creatures that Zelda had created using magic.

One book was full of bright images and funny rhymes, completely suitable for children Zelda’s Absurd Curiosities.

 

Whilst the other was a small book of very dark poetry and rituals that was only suitable for adults – Zelda’s Darkly Absurd Curiosities.

Z.D.A.C.A._-_CoverRead more about the child-friendly book Zelda’s Absurd Curiosities here

http://absurdcuriosities.wordpress.com/

Read more about the adult-friendly book Zelda’s Absurd Curiosities here

https://darklyabsurdcuriosities.wordpress.com/

 

 


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